When God calls you on your promises
It is one thing to tell God over and over that you are surrendering. It is one thing to inform him that you trust him no matter what else happens. It is one thing to say that he can take it away at a moment’s notice and you will be alright.
It is another thing entirely when he looks you in the eye and asks you to do just that.
Giving up expectations is easier said than done. There is the temptation to ask God whether everything that had come before had just been a trick; whether it is in his divine will to mess with my head. There is the temptation to try and fit the new status quo into my own narrow perception of the universe.
But in the end, all I can do is give up and sit at his feet. And admit that I don’t have a clue what is going on and I can’t make rhyme or reason of it, but that’s okay. And ask what he has to teach me. And strain my ears to hear his whispers. And as I sit there, little phrases start to come to me, as though they were wafting in the wind.
Be still and know that I am God…
You give and take away, my heart will choose to say ‘Lord blessed be your name’…
Behold, I will allure her, and bring her into the wilderness, and speak tenderly to her…
I am the LORD your God, I will not share my glory with another….
So I let those phrases pour over as I give up and lay my head down to sleep. And I wake up no longer torn and heartsick, but quieted and cherished, singing words like,
I’ve found a sweet haven of sunshine at last
and Jesus abiding above
His dear arms around me are lovingly cast
And sweetly He tells His love.
He saw me endangered and lovingly came
To quiet my storm beaten soul
Sweet words He has spoken and bless His dear name
The billows no longer roll.
His love shall control me through life and in death
Completely I’ll trust to the end
I’ll praise Him forever and with my last breath
I’ll sing of my soul’s best friend.
The tempest is o’er
I’m safe evermore
What gladness what rapture is mine
The danger is past
I’m anchored at last
Anchored in Love Divine
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